What happens when you take a farm girl out of Northern Michigan, send her to U of M Law School, and then make her a partner in a major Detroit law firm? The obvious, of course -- she chucks a six figure income for a life on the stage, begging for attention and laughs (just like at home), just because SHE CAN! And, apparently, the Prozac wasn't working all that well, either.
Telling the truth is Connie's strong point, something she found was not totally compatible with the practice of law, and Connie tells it like it is. Why did she really leave the practice of law? Unbearable irritation with the stupid people who sought to abuse the legal process for their own personal gain had a lot to do with it. Ridiculous lawsuits, bogus claims and outrageous jury awards to the criminally stupid are the kindling for Connie's act. Add kerosene (an audience) and fire (Connie's slightly warped sense of reality and dedication to "thinning out the herd of the stupid"), plus the visual appeal of the ever popular PowerPoint presentation, and you have a recipe for a night of irreverent observations and explosive laughter.
Connie was raised in Standish, Michigan, home of the infamous “cussing canoeist” case, and grew up hoeing beans, driving the tractor, fantasizing about becoming the next Atticus Finch after seeing To Kill a Mockingbird at age 7, and intermittently fighting with her three sisters, the youngest of which she still contends deprived her of her rightful status as the baby of the family, a title she held successfully for 11 years. Connie’s father was a farmer and factory worker and her mother was a homemaker, and although she is the product of solid Polish stock, she became fascinated with Julia Child, big time wrestling and roller derby in the first grade. If only therapy had been more readily available, the events of the future might have been avoided.
Connie graduated from the University of Michigan, both undergraduate and law school and was admitted to the State Bar of Michigan in 1980. She was the youngest lawyer in her firm to practice law at age 23. She became a shareholder in the firm in the mid-1980s and stayed there until, desirous of a change of scene and management styles, she left to pursue a career of blissful sloth. Growing bored, she then signed on as “Of counsel” with a small Bloomfield Hills law firm with which she had a previous relationship, where she stayed for about four years before deciding that perhaps she and the law were no longer a good fit.
After becoming involved in community volunteer activities and too much television, her husband of (now) 31 years, David, suggested she take some comedy classes and she has been assaulting audiences with her wit and wisdom ever since. For this career change, the State Bar of Michigan is eternally grateful.